Really loved the way that this touched on grief as a motivator for bed rot, surrender, & apathy, and the refusal to show contempt for women who take this "deal". For all the bad-faith commentators, I've only ever seen you write empathy, compassion, and love for the puppygirl. Meaningful, genuine love that wants to see the puppygirl unchain herself from a sinking ship.
Shame and envy. Felt that reading this essay and the puppy dog one as well. I think that’s probably pretty common. Shame that I even have the desire to be taken care of to that extent but still envy for it and a deep thirst for a taste of it.
Not that I would. Of course I wouldn’t. I absolutely understand the burden that would place on everyone around me. And the guilt of that would be absolutely too devastating to indulge. But both emotions are still there. I don’t like what it says about me but it says it.
Honestly I think this mix of emotions is part of why the aesthetic of powerlessness pays. I can’t do it myself but hey I can give twenty to a grocery fund and feel… something vicariously. Again, I hate what this says about me but it’s there.
Do we always have to get trapped in these ultra specialized economies of provider and provided? Can’t we actually learn to lean on each other and support each other so we can cover each other’s bad days and months and, unsteadily and loping, move forward into some kind of sustainable partnership (number of partners changeable based on polycule or other arrangement)?
And of course the answer is inconvenience. The inconvenience of questioning and of speaking out and being the one who points out how stupid and lopsided the current system is. Fuck this co dependent nonsense.
It is sad that people often prefer someone they can pity to someone they can admire.
Really loved the way that this touched on grief as a motivator for bed rot, surrender, & apathy, and the refusal to show contempt for women who take this "deal". For all the bad-faith commentators, I've only ever seen you write empathy, compassion, and love for the puppygirl. Meaningful, genuine love that wants to see the puppygirl unchain herself from a sinking ship.
Shame and envy. Felt that reading this essay and the puppy dog one as well. I think that’s probably pretty common. Shame that I even have the desire to be taken care of to that extent but still envy for it and a deep thirst for a taste of it.
Not that I would. Of course I wouldn’t. I absolutely understand the burden that would place on everyone around me. And the guilt of that would be absolutely too devastating to indulge. But both emotions are still there. I don’t like what it says about me but it says it.
Honestly I think this mix of emotions is part of why the aesthetic of powerlessness pays. I can’t do it myself but hey I can give twenty to a grocery fund and feel… something vicariously. Again, I hate what this says about me but it’s there.
Do we always have to get trapped in these ultra specialized economies of provider and provided? Can’t we actually learn to lean on each other and support each other so we can cover each other’s bad days and months and, unsteadily and loping, move forward into some kind of sustainable partnership (number of partners changeable based on polycule or other arrangement)?
And of course the answer is inconvenience. The inconvenience of questioning and of speaking out and being the one who points out how stupid and lopsided the current system is. Fuck this co dependent nonsense.